Blessed Be Your Name

November 30th was Luke's 7th birthday.

My, how time flies.

It's been a while since I have actually been able to celebrate with him on his birthday. Most years it's been around his birthday. But this year, it overlapped our volunteering with Operation Christmas Child in Charlotte.

On Tuesday night, my brother went to Luke's school to paint one of their rocks that would tell everyone that Luke was seven. In the dark and in the rain, he spray painted the rock blue and wrote in bright yellow. What a good daddy. And what a pretty special thing for a kid.

On Wednesday, my mom, sister-in-law and other nephew joined Luke for lunch at school and brought in cupcakes for his class. He was so eager to have Nana walk him back to class and show her where his desk was.

That evening, the plan was to eat pizza for dinner and then make a cookie cake and milkshakes and open presents. At least that is what Luke thought. See, on Friday of the previous week, when we were all together at his bowling party, one of his gifts was horse back riding lessons from my parents. Little did he know, he had his first one on the night of his birthday! Wasting time back at my brother's house after school, Luke's riding helmet and boots were snuck into the car. We only had about an hour to wait.

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November 30th was also the day that the Lord ended my grandfather's pain and suffering on this earth. What a bittersweet kind of day. On a day filled with celebrating another year of life for one, the pain of death for another was all too present. The one thing that kept coming to my mind that night was this song:

Blessed be Your name

In the land that is plentiful

Where Your streams of abundance flow

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name

When I'm found in the desert place

Though I walk through the wilderness

Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name

When the sun's shining down on me

When the world's all as it should be

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name

On the road marked with suffering

Though there's pain in the offering

Blessed be Your name

You give and take away

You give and take away

My heart will choose to say Lord

Blessed be Your name

Indeed, even in the middle of a celebration, the Lord can take away. Even in the middle of happiness, one can still feel grief and sorrow, one minute smiling with joy at the sight of Luke riding his first horse and the next, tears welling up because of the loss of a loved one. My dad's dad.

Just a few minutes before we were to head out the door for the riding lesson, my dad called my mom. I was on my way upstairs to grab my sweatshirt, and as soon as my mom answered the phone, I knew the news on the other end was not good. My dad, alone in Florida, was calling to tell us of my grandfather's passing. On our end, we were shocked, saddened, filled with grief at how quickly the events turned. Just minutes earlier, my mom was working on securing a medical flight to transport my grandfather to Raleigh. A grim reminder that life is precious and fleeting, and even though 85 years seems so long, the reality is it is just a vapor.

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We continued on with Luke's riding lesson as planned. The last thing my dad would want is for everyone to cancel birthday plans. But it was hard to deal with mixed emotions. On one hand, you want to be fully present and engaged in the happiness of Luke's birthday and his very first riding lesson. Smiling because he had just learned how to turn the horse, all the while fighting back tears at the thought of losing a loved one just an hour earlier.

It was a tough night. But in the midst of sorrow, we had a ray of sunshine. We saw Luke master his first lesson. We ate pizza, made milkshakes and opened presents. The boys were troopers with all the emotions and phone calls that night and handled the news well.

While I'm not thankful that we've lost another member of our family or that my dad is grieving the loss of his dad, I am thankful that there is rest coming for my parents. Rest after they have worked day in and day out to move my grandfather to Raleigh and find him a safe place to live. Rest after all the phone calls and paperwork with the doctors. Rest after frustrations with the medical care my grandfather received. While none of that rest diminishes the pain of losing someone, I choose to stay lost in the presence of Jesus, because He is good and He is sovereign and He never gives us more than we can handle.

He gives and takes away.

Blessed be the name of the Lord.